Jeanne Phillips

Jeanne Phillips (/ˈdʒiːni/;[1] born 1942),[2] also known as Abigail Van Buren, is an American advice columnist who has written for the advice column Dear Abby. She is the daughter of Pauline Esther Phillips, who founded Dear Abby in 1956, and her husband, Morton Phillips.

In a Dear Abby column on December 12, 2000, Pauline introduced Jeanne as co-editor of Dear Abby.[3] They began to share the byline "Abigail Van Buren", and both were pictured with the column. Jeanne officially assumed the mantle of Dear Abby in July 2002, when the Phillips family made the announcement that Pauline had been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease.

Although the change took place in 2000, the official statement, that included adding "Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips" at the bottom of each column, did not take place until July 2002.[4]

Jeanne Phillips' Dear Abby column is syndicated in about 1,400 newspapers in the U.S. with a combined circulation of more than 110 million.[5] Dear Abby's website receives about 10,000 letters per week,[6] seeking advice on a large variety of personal matters.[7]

Dear Abby

Jeanne Phillips' history with Dear Abby
Dear Abby star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame memorializing the Dear Abby radio show
When you're having lunch with her, you get the urge to put down your butter knife, spill your life story and shed tears. Maybe it's her endearing lisp, her Midwest upbringing or her unblinking eyes. Or maybe she just gives more of a darn.

—Neal Justin in the Star Tribune[1]

Jeanne Phillips began assisting her mother, Pauline Phillips, with the Dear Abby column at the age of 14 in order to earn an allowance. When Jeanne asked her mother for an allowance, Pauline answered, "What are you going to do for it?" Pauline then said that her Dear Abby column received a substantial amount of mail from teenagers and that Jeanne could reply to some of them. If Jeanne's responses were "good", her mother would use them in the column. If her responses were not good, Jeanne would rewrite them.[8] Jeanne spent her allowance money on watching movies and plays. She went to San Francisco several times to see the play, Li'l Abner.[9]

In the 1970s, Phillips helped her mother write over half of the columns for her nationally syndicated radio show on CBS News.[10][11] In 1980, she became the radio show's column executive editor, and in 1987, she became its co-editor.[10] Phillips spent six years helping with the radio show.[12] Beginning in 1987, she worked with her mother on the nationally syndicated Dear Abby column. She began writing a majority of the columns since the early 1990s, though her mother did not publicly acknowledge her as the column's co-writer until 2000. Jeanne worked as the writer, while Pauline edited. While Pauline remained at home, Jeanne would manage the office and their paid staff.[13] Mother and daughter were listed as the writers after a December 12, 2000, letter to readers.[14] A photo of the two was affixed to each column. Beginning on July 22, 2002 Jeanne was attributed as the only writer, adding "Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips" at the bottom of each column.[4] Kathie Kerr, a spokeswoman for Universal Press Syndicate, the distributor of the column, said: "Over the past couple of years, Pauline Phillips hasn't had any day-to-day activities with the column."[15] The column's photo, which had both the mother and daughter, was replaced with only the daughter's photo.[12]

Every day, her column reaches 110 million people through syndication in about 1,400 newspapers.[8][16] Every week, she gets from 5,000 to 10,000 letters and emails asking her for advice.[14][17] Owing to email's growing usage, by 2013 less than 10% of her letters were through postal mail.[18] Phillips said she yearned for tangible letters for being more intimate because as described by the Palm Beach Daily News she could see "tear stains on the stationery, the smell of cigarette smoke in the paper, the penmanship style and other things that reflect the individual writing".[18] Reading and replying to the mail sometimes takes her more than eight hours a day.[14] After crafting a response, Phillips sets it aside. A few days later, she reviews it to ensure that her feelings about the subject remain unchanged.[19] When she is not knowledgeable about a subject, she consults experts from various fields, including "medical, psychiatric, legal, ethical", and religious.[20] Phillips noted that the column touches on numerous topics, including "organ donation, domestic violence, mental health, child safety, volunteerism, civility, alcohol abuse, inhalant abuse ... and the dangers of tobacco".[21] According to Pernell Watson of the Daily Press, Phillips will send an unprinted, confidential reply to readers who send a "self-addressed, stamped envelope".[10]

On Valentine's Day in 2001, the Dear Abby radio show was honored with the 2,172nd star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Around 60 family members and friends took part in the 30-minute ceremony. Jeanne Phillips paid the $15,000 sponsorship fee for the star and its maintenance to honor her mother. The Dear Abby radio show lasted for 12 years. Jeanne wrote and produced Pauline's shows; Pauline was the host.[22]

In 2018, Phillips counseled a letter writer not to name their kids with "unusual" names. She wrote, "Not only can foreign names be difficult to pronounce and spell, but they can also cause a child to be teased unmercifully. Sometimes the name can be a problematic word in the English language. And one that sounds beautiful in a foreign language can be grating in English." The New York Times's John Eligon said her response sparked fierce discussion on social media and "has inspired a fresh debate about identity, acceptance and inclusion".[23]

Style and support of gay marriage

Jeanne Phillips characterized her mother's style as "softer", while she herself "[gets] to the root of the problem quickly".[8] Both Jeanne and Pauline have made gay marriage a topic in their column.[8] In 1984, Pauline directed the parent of a gay child to Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG).[24] In 2007, her daughter openly announced her support of gay marriage. In the same year, she was given the "Straight for Equality" award by PFLAG.[24]

Operation Dear Abby

During the Vietnam War, in 1967, Phillips' mother started Operation Dear Abby, through which holiday messages were sent to American soldiers.[25] Phillips' mother was inspired to create this service when Billy Thompson, a sergeant, requested a letter from home for his Christmas present.[26]

When the 2001 anthrax attacks occurred, the operation was postponed.[27][28] Jeanne Phillips collaborated with The Pentagon to create an Internet substitute. In 2003, the website received on average 20,000 to 30,000 messages every day. Prior to the Iraq War, the website received only 2,000 to 3,000 messages every day.[25]

The messages are categorized by state and uniformed service but are not sent to specific individuals.[25] Soldiers received the messages by either accessing them on OperationDearAbby.net or when their officers printed out the messages for distribution.[29]

Interviews and media

Phillips has appeared on many television talk shows, including multiple appearances on CNN's Larry King Live.[30] Many prestigious national organizations have acknowledged her for her advice and efforts to educate her readers on different topics including those related to health, safety, and acceptance of multiculturalism and diversity.

On December 1, 2005, Jeanne made her first live radio broadcast via Internet radio.[31] In her press release regarding that broadcast, she said that she sometimes calls people who have written her since, in many cases, it is easier to advise people over the phone than through letters.[8][31]

Personal life

Jeanne Phillips was born in Minneapolis, Minnesota,[32] to Pauline Esther "Popo" Phillips, the founder of Dear Abby,[13] and Morton Phillips[33] in 1942.[2][12][34][35] Her grandfather, Jay Phillips, was born in Russia in 1898 and immigrated to Wisconsin when he was two years old.[36] When Jeanne was three years old, her family moved from Minnesota to Eau Claire, Wisconsin.[1] Phillips went to elementary school in Hillsborough, California, and attended Burlingame High School for two years. After her sophomore year she transferred to Crystal Springs Uplands School and attended the private school for one year. Shortly thereafter, her family moved back to Twin Cities in Minnesota so her father could take the helm of her feeble grandfather's liquor distribution business.[1][8] For her senior year she attended Washburn High School in Minneapolis.[1] Phillips enjoyed the school, saying, "I loved it. I was never the most popular girl in the class. I never aspired to be. But I did make very nice friends."[1] In college, she majored in English and anthropology,[21] and studied anthropology at the University of Colorado and UCLA though she did not work in the field.[14] She attempted interior design and ran the company Jeanne Phillips Interiors but ultimately decided it was unsatisfactory.[14][37]

Phillips' aunt, Esther Pauline "Eppie" Lederer—Pauline's twin sister and the final columnist of the Ask Ann Landers advice column—died in June 2002. In addition to penning a tribute column, Phillips read a poem about her aunt on Larry King Live. In an interview with the South Florida Sun-Sentinel in 2001, Lederer said: "Jeanne has been working with her mother for 20 years, and it seems to be a perfect fit." Lederer's daughter, Margo Howard, wrote an advice column[1] for 45 years until 2013.[38] After Phillips' appearance on Larry King Live, her cousin Howard censured her. Phillips said: "The term a lot of people have been using is feud. All I can say, and this is from my heart to yours, there's no feud on my part. I wish my cousin the best."[20]

Phillips married Luke McKissack on September 16, 1973, at the Beverly Wilshire Hotel. The California Supreme Court Justice Stanley Mosk officiated at the wedding and Herb Alpert performed. Phillips wore an "antique lace gown". Eppie Lederer and her husband and Irving Stone and his wife were among the attendees.[37] She called him a "brilliant, charming, talented" ,[13] and he was a California lawyer.[20] The marriage was not successful.[13] She planned to remain single but later fell in love again. In 2001, she married her second husband, a real estate investor[8] named Walter Harris.[20]

Every day, Phillips reads the letters sent to her Dear Abby column and pens her column in the afternoon.[8] In the evenings, she either cooks or goes out to dinner with her husband.[8] When asked who her Dear Abby was, Phillips replied that her husband is her "primary support" and her friends her "secondary support".[39]

She has largely kept her personal life to herself,[8] making only occasional references to it while advising people or during interviews. In comparison to her cousin, Margo Howard, Phillips has been called "reserved".[1]

Phillips had a brother, Edward "Eddie" Phillips,[40] who was born in 1945 and died in 2011 of multiple myeloma.[41] According to his obituary in the Star Tribune, Eddie was a "liquor tycoon", a "gifted businessman", and a philanthropist who "enlarged a family tradition of generous giving".[41] He had four children: sons Dean, Tyler, and J.J., and a daughter Hutton; the latter two were twins.[41]

According to a 2002 interview, Phillips and her husband have no children. In 2002, the Phillips family revealed that Jeanne's mother, Pauline, had been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease.[3] Tim Johnson, a medical journalist for ABC News, wrote in February 2010 that Pauline resides with her husband, Morton, in Minnetonka, Minnesota and has caregivers.[42] Pauline's son, Eddie, said:

We call them angels because they are who are with her 24/7. She watches a lot of television. She loves visitors. She loves to get out. And when she gets out she still wears her Dear Abby sweatshirt and loves to smile and wave and blow kisses.[42]

Pauline Phillips died in 2013 at the age of 94.[43]

Phillips is Jewish.[44] In her column, she writes holiday greetings to people of many religions and occasionally gives advice to people based on their religion.

On August 14, 2018, Phillips' nephew Dean won the Democratic (Democratic-Farmer-Labor Party) nomination for United States Congress from Minnesota's 3rd congressional district.[45][46] On November 6, Dean went on to win the general election during the 2018 midterm elections.[47]

See also

References
  1. Justin, Neal (July 20, 2002). "Dear Abby's daughter emerges as Dear Abby". Star Tribune. Archived from the original on July 27, 2011. Retrieved July 27, 2011.
  2. Weiner, Richard; Levine, Charles M. (2006). The Skinny About Best boys, Dollies, Green Rooms, Leads, and Other Media Lingo: The Language of the Media. New York: Random House. p. 15. ISBN 0-375-72147-9. Jeanne Phillips (b. 1942) writes Dear Abby, the advice column started by her mother Pauline Esther Phillips (b. 1918 as Pauline Esther Friedman).
  3. "Dear Abby creator has Alzheimer's, family announces". Chicago Tribune. August 7, 2002. Archived from the original on September 14, 2011. Retrieved September 26, 2010.
  4. Freed, Josh (July 18, 2002). "'Dear Abby' Daughter Takes Over". Editor & Publisher. Associated Press. Archived from the original on May 23, 2020. Retrieved May 23, 2020.
  5. "'Dear Abby' Dies; Pauline Phillips Was Adviser To Millions". NPR. Retrieved March 28, 2019.
  6. Margalit Fox (January 1, 2013). "Pauline Phillips, Flinty Adviser to Millions as Dear Abby, Dies at 94". The New York Times. ISSN 0362-4331. Retrieved March 28, 2019.
  7. "Dear Abby: Thank you for p ..." The Washington Post. August 28, 2004. ISSN 0190-8286. Retrieved August 15, 2019.
  8. Hartlaub, Peter (April 14, 2008). "Dear Abby is her own woman". San Francisco Chronicle. Archived from the original on September 20, 2009. Retrieved September 20, 2009.
  9. Hartlaub, Peter (January 24, 2009). "Dear Abby on good times, people". San Francisco Chronicle. Archived from the original on September 20, 2009. Retrieved September 20, 2009.
  10. Watson, Pernell (May 14, 2011). "Mother, Daughter Writer Dear Abby". Daily Press. Archived from the original on September 15, 2011. Retrieved September 15, 2011.
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  12. Weiner, Richard (Fall 2002). "An Ode to Ann Landers and Dear Abby". Public Relations Quarterly. ISSN 0033-3700. Archived from the original on May 23, 2020. Retrieved May 23, 2020 – via Gale.
  13. Wilson, Amy (September 5, 2001). "Dear Abby and Daughter; Jeanne Phillips Is Now Co-Writer of Her Mother's Column". The Orange County Register. Archived from the original on September 20, 2009. Retrieved September 20, 2009.
  14. Coulter, Aiysha (September 6, 2011). "Dear Abby now offers daughter advice about column". Erie Times-News. Archived from the original on September 14, 2011. Retrieved September 14, 2011.
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  24. Leff, Lisa (October 10, 2007). "'Dear Abby' says she's for gay marriage". The Pantagraph. Associated Press. Archived from the original on September 20, 2009. Retrieved September 20, 2009.
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  28. Tyler, Greg; Bongioanni, Carlos (November 15, 2001). "Stateside groups use computers to keep Any Servicemember programs going". Stars and Stripes. Archived from the original on September 20, 2009. Retrieved September 20, 2009.
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  32. Lambert, Brian (October 12, 2012). "Twin Cities TV market: 11,000-plus political ads for $13 million". MinnPost. Archived from the original on June 15, 2020. Retrieved June 15, 2020.
  33. "Dear Abby". Washington Post. June 20, 2004. Archived from the original on September 20, 2009. Retrieved September 20, 2009. To fathers everywhere -- birth fathers, stepfathers, foster fathers, too: Happy Father's Day to all of you. And to my own father, Morton Phillips in Minneapolis, a Happy Father's Day to my one and only "Pop."
  34. McElroy, Jack (July 24, 2012). "Goodbye, Dear Abby". Knoxville News Sentinel. Archived from the original on May 18, 2013. Retrieved May 18, 2013. Born in 1959, Amy represented a younger generation than the Friedman twins, or even Jeanne Phillips, who was born in 1942.
  35. Bloom, Connie (July 28, 2002). "Dear Abby Debuts to Fill Gap Caused by Ann Lander's Death". Akron Beacon Journal. Archived from the original on September 15, 2011. Retrieved September 14, 2011. Jeanne, 60, has shared writing and/or editing duties since she was 14.
  36. Tellijohn, Andrew (October 22, 2006). "Phillips family has long history of giving to community". Minneapolis St. Paul Business Journal. American City Business Journals. Archived from the original on May 18, 2013. Retrieved May 18, 2013.
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  39. Gutierrez, Lisa (November 14, 2002). "The art of being Dear Abby; Jeanne Phillips follows her heart in dispensing advice to readers". The Hamilton Spectator. Archived from the original on July 26, 2011. Retrieved July 26, 2011.
  40. Ander, Marsha S. (June 8, 1991). "At 72, 'Dear Abby' Says Retirement Is A Dirty Word". St. Louis Post-Dispatch. Archived from the original on September 15, 2011. Retrieved September 14, 2011.
  41. Lemagie, Sarah (April 11, 2011). "Liquor tycoon was known for philanthropy". Star Tribune. Archived from the original on May 18, 2013. Retrieved May 18, 2013.
  42. Johnson, Tim (February 12, 2010). "'Dear Abby' Struggles With Alzheimer's". Good Morning America. ABC News. Archived from the original on September 14, 2011. Retrieved September 14, 2011.
  43. Fox, Margalit. "Pauline Phillips, Flinty Adviser to Millions as Dear Abby, Dies at 94". Archived from the original on May 18, 2013. Retrieved May 14, 2013.
  44. Numbich, Paul David (2009). The Faith Next Door: American Christians and Their New Religious Neighbors. Oxford University Press. p. 156. ISBN 0-19-538621-3. Retrieved September 20, 2009.
  45. Miner, Sean (August 14, 2018). "Dean Phillips wins 3rd District DFL primary". hometownsource.com. Retrieved August 15, 2018.
  46. Frachtenberg, Ben (August 14, 2018). "'Dear Abby's Jewish Grandson Wins Primary in Minnesota Swing District". forward.com. Retrieved August 15, 2018.
  47. "MN Election Results". electionresults.sos.state.mn.us. Office of the Minnesota Secretary of State. Retrieved November 7, 2018.
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