The Slicer

"The Slicer"
	Seinfeld episode
Episode no.	Season 9; Episode 7
Directed by	Andy Ackerman
Story by	Gregg Kavet & Andy Robin & Darin Henry
Teleplay by	Gregg Kavet & Andy Robin
Production code	907
Original air date	November 13, 1997
Guest appearance(s)
	Marcia Cross as Sara; Daniel von Bargen as Mr. Kruger; Larry B. Scott as Arthur Milano; David Moreland as Mr. Parry;

"The Slicer" is the 163rd episode of the NBC sitcom Seinfeld. This was the seventh episode of the ninth and final season. It first aired on November 13, 1997.[1]

Plot

George interviews with Kruger Industrial Smoothing and gets a job. He's horrified when he sees himself in the background of a family photo Kruger (Daniel von Bargen) keeps in his office; a past incident would get him fired.

George explains the 1989 "boombox incident" to Kramer and Jerry at Monk's Café: George was at the beach and a family sat down next to him. After returning from swimming, George found all his things gone. Believing the family had thrown them in the ocean, George angrily screams at the kids then throws their boombox the same way. Moments later, he found his things in the water and realized they'd ended up there because of the tide, not the kids. Their father, Kruger, demanded George pay for the boombox, and George evaded it by giving him a fake address.

George is now worried that he may get fired once Kruger recognizes him from the picture. Kramer suggests sneaking the picture out and getting George's image airbrushed out. George takes to the idea and leaves. Meanwhile, Kramer is annoyed at the "misshaped, shoddy meats" in the sandwiches he eats, stating that he "hasn't had a decent sandwich in 13 years." He solves his problem by getting a meat slicer.

Elaine can't sleep because her neighbor forgot to turn off the alarm clock before leaving for Paris. Kramer tells her that the same thing happened to his friend Lomez, so he (Lomez) blew his neighbor's circuit. He and Elaine then set off to do just that. Meanwhile, Jerry begins dating a doctor, Sara Sitarides (Marcia Cross).

The next day, George goes to pick up the picture, but finds out Kruger was airbrushed out instead of him (due to Kruger's baldness, the clerk mistook him for George, since George in the picture still had hair. He also points this out to George, annoying him further). Elaine realizes her neighbor's cat (whose meowing is worse than the alarm clock) now can't eat because shutting off the power also shut off its automatic feeder. Jerry tells Elaine his date with Dr. Sitarides didn't go well because she kept making him feel like "if I don't save lives, I'm worthless." Elaine then reveals that Sitarides is a dermatologist and Jerry gets annoyed at this, not considering a dermatologist to be a "life-saver", and noting that their advice to patients is simply to "put some Aloe on it." George convinces him to go on a "revenge date" to tell her off.

Elaine and Kramer go back to Elaine's apartment with the meat slicer and feed the cat under the door. Elaine borrows Kramer's slicer, but uses it for slicing other things, including an uneven pair of heels. She eventually gets a piece of her heel stuck in it. Jerry's revenge date doesn't go well when a former patient of Sitarides' comes up and thanks her for saving his life. The reason: he had skin cancer. George goes back to the Foto Hut, and finds himself airbrushed out, and only a drawing of Kruger back in. He then realizes he has to get a photo of his boss without his shirt on (as he was in the picture) to put back in.

When Elaine drops by to pick up pliers to remove the heel from Kramer's slicer, she drops a helpful tip about how Sitarides goes by offices screening people for skin cancer (that's how they met). George then realizes all he has to do is set up a screening at Kruger's and he can get his picture (after Jerry apologizes to Sitarides). Kramer goes to Elaine's to pick up his slicer. She manages to get the heel out just in time, but dings up the blade in the process. When trying to get back into Elaine's apartment, he accidentally pulls off her doorknob, trapping her inside.

Jerry starts getting an allergic reaction. Kramer thinks Sitarides gave it to him when he went down to apologize to her. He decides to go down to Kruger's - where Sitarides is doing the cancer screening - and ask her. Kramer comes along to pick up his blade. Jerry insults Sitarides and causes her to leave. As Kruger comes in for his screening, Kramer (with his white butcher's coat on) takes Sitarides's place as the doctor (Dr. Van Nostrand). Kramer then checks Kruger for moles ("the freckle's ugly cousin," as Kramer puts it). He takes a picture of Kruger for George, but finds a mole on Kruger's right shoulder.

To drown out the cat's meowing, Elaine turns up her stereo to max volume. As she tries to call a locksmith to fix her door, one of her neighbors keeps yelling at her to shut off her radio, before finally getting fed up and blowing Elaine's circuit like she and Kramer did, cutting off her call to the locksmith and leaving her without power.

George gets the picture fixed and Kramer starts getting into dermatology. While flipping through one of Kramer's medical books, Jerry finds a section on his condition and figures out that his hives came from an allergic reaction to Benzene, commonly used as a metal cleaner. Kramer had been using Jerry's hand towel with metal cleaner to clean his slicer blade, and gave him hives. George returns to work and suggests Kruger go see another dermatologist about his mole, but finds Kruger isn't worried about it. Because the mole is visible in the picture (which he thinks was taken in 1989), he thinks it hasn't grown. Kruger then reveals to George about that day when he and his kids took this "pear-shaped loser[s]" clothes and threw it all in the ocean. Finally learning the truth, George gets mad and informs him that the pear-shaped loser was him and that he went to great lengths to remove himself from Kruger's family picture; Kruger replies, "Well I'll be - you have lost a lot of hair." George answers, "That's what they tell me!"

At the end of the episode, Kramer, George and Jerry camp outside Elaine's apartment, feeding her under the door until the locksmith arrives. Jerry sees another dermatologist who prescribed him Aloe to treat his hives and George ends up not getting fired anyway because Kruger "didn't care."

References

"The Slicer" - TV.com

External links

"The Slicer" at IMDb

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[1] "The Slicer" - TV.com

Seinfeld episodes
Season 1	"The Seinfeld Chronicles" "The Stake Out" "The Robbery" "Male Unbonding" "The Stock Tip"
Season 2	"The Ex-Girlfriend" "The Pony Remark" "The Jacket" "The Phone Message" "The Apartment" "The Statue" "The Revenge" "The Heart Attack" "The Deal" "The Baby Shower" "The Chinese Restaurant" "The Busboy"
Season 3	"The Note" "The Truth" "The Pen" "The Dog" "The Library" "The Parking Garage" "The Cafe" "The Tape" "The Nose Job" "The Stranded" "The Alternate Side" "The Red Dot" "The Subway" "The Pez Dispenser" "The Suicide" "The Fix-Up" "The Boyfriend" "The Limo" "The Good Samaritan" "The Letter" "The Parking Space" "The Keys"
Season 4	"The Trip" "The Pitch" "The Ticket" "The Wallet" "The Watch" "The Bubble Boy" "The Cheever Letters" "The Opera" "The Virgin" "The Contest" "The Airport" "The Pick" "The Movie" "The Visa" "The Shoes" "The Outing" "The Old Man" "The Implant" "The Junior Mint" "The Smelly Car" "The Handicap Spot" "The Pilot"
Season 5	"The Mango" "The Puffy Shirt" "The Glasses" "The Sniffing Accountant" "The Bris" "The Lip Reader" "The Non-Fat Yogurt" "The Barber" "The Masseuse" "The Cigar Store Indian" "The Conversion" "The Stall" "The Dinner Party" "The Marine Biologist" "The Pie" "The Stand In" "The Wife" "The Raincoats" "The Fire" "The Hamptons" "The Opposite"
Season 6	"The Chaperone" "The Big Salad" "The Pledge Drive" "The Chinese Woman" "The Couch" "The Gymnast" "The Soup" "The Mom & Pop Store" "The Secretary" "The Race" "The Switch" "The Label Maker" "The Scofflaw" "The Highlights of 100" "The Beard" "The Kiss Hello" "The Doorman" "The Jimmy" "The Doodle" "The Fusilli Jerry" "The Diplomat's Club" "The Face Painter" "The Understudy"
Season 7	"The Engagement" "The Postponement" "The Maestro" "The Wink" "The Hot Tub" "The Soup Nazi" "The Secret Code" "The Pool Guy" "The Sponge" "The Gum" "The Rye" "The Caddy" "The Seven" "The Cadillac" "The Shower Head" "The Doll" "The Friar's Club" "The Wig Master" "The Calzone" "The Bottle Deposit" "The Wait Out" "The Invitations"
Season 8	"The Foundation" "The Soul Mate" "The Bizarro Jerry" "The Little Kicks" "The Package" "The Fatigues" "The Checks" "The Chicken Roaster" "The Abstinence" "The Andrea Doria" "The Little Jerry" "The Money" "The Comeback" "The Van Buren Boys" "The Susie" "The Pothole" "The English Patient" "The Nap" "The Yada Yada" "The Millennium" "The Muffin Tops" "The Summer of George"
Season 9	"The Butter Shave" "The Voice" "The Serenity Now" "The Blood" "The Junk Mail" "The Merv Griffin Show" "The Slicer" "The Betrayal" "The Apology" "The Strike" "The Dealership" "The Reverse Peephole" "The Cartoon" "The Strongbox" "The Wizard" "The Burning" "The Bookstore" "The Frogger" "The Maid" "The Puerto Rican Day" "The Chronicle" "The Finale"
Indicates two-part episode